GIANTS IN THE EARTH -- FAFHRD and GRAY MOUSER

FAFHRD
medium humanoid (human), neutral good
ranger (hunter) 10th level, bard (college of valor) 5th level; background: guide

AC: 16; HP: 165 (10D10+5d8+80); Initiative: +4; Senses: passive Perception 23; Speed: 40 ft., climb 40 ft., swim 40 ft.

STR: 18, DEX: 18, CON: 19, INT: 17, WIS: 16, CHA: 17

Saves: STR +9, DEX +9; Skills: Athletics +14, Insight +8, Nature +8, Performance +8, Perception +13, Sleight of Hand +14, Stealth +14, Survival +13; Feats: Crusher, Lucky, Magic Initiate (Druid), Skilled, Tough, Unarmed Fighting; Tool Proficiency: Baliset, Cartographer's Tools; Weapon Proficiency: Simple, Martial; Armor Proficiency: Medium, Shield; Languages: Common, Druidic, Northern Speech, Sign, Thieves' Cant; CR: 4 (1,100 XP); PB: +5

TRAITS
Combat Inspiration: An ally who has one of your Bardic Inspiration dice can use it to activate either the offense or defense option listed in the PHB under this ability.
Decrease Exhaustion: Whenever you complete a Short Rest, your Exhaustion level, if any, decreases by 1.
Defensive Tactics: Whenever you complete a short rest, you may select from one of the following features: Escape the Horde or Multiattack Defense.
Font of Inspiration: Regain all expended uses of Bardic Inspiration when you finish a Short Rest. Additionally, you can expend a spell slot (no action required) to regain one expended use of it.
Hunter's Lore: While a creature is marked by your hunter's mark, you know whether that creature has any immunities, resistances or vulnerabilities, and if the creature has any, you know what they are.
Hunter's Prey: Whenever you complete a short rest, you may select from one of the following features: Colossus Slayer or Horde Breaker.
Jack of All Trades: You can add half your PB (round down) to any ability check that uses a skill proficiency that you lack.
Resourceful: You gain Heroic Inspiration whenever you finish a Long Rest.

ACTION
Multiattack: You can make up to two melee attacks using your longsword (Graywand) and poignard (Heartseeker).
Longsword (Graywand): melee weapon attack (+10 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: D8+5 slashing damage PLUS target has disadvantage on their next attack before the start of your next turn)
Poignard (Heartseeker): melee weapon attack (+10 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: D6+5 piercing damage PLUS you have advantage on your next attack against target until the end of your next turn)
Unarmed Strike: melee natural weapon attack (+9 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: D6+4 OR D8+4 bludgeoning damage; D4+4 bludgeoning damage only when grappled)
Temporary HP (3 times/Long Rest): Add D8+3 temporary HP to your maximum.

BONUS ACTION
Bardic Inspiration (3/Long Rest): Bestow Bardic Inspiration D8 to your ally.
Favored Enemy (4/Long Rest): You can cast hunter's mark without using a spell slot.

SPELLCASTING
Attribute: WIS or CHA; Spell DC: 16; Spell Attack: +8; Prepared Spells: 18
Always Prepared (1/Long Rest): longstrider
Cantrips: druidcraft, friends, light, message, prestidigitation, resistance, shillelagh
1st Level (4 slots): comprehend languages, detect magic, detect poison and disease, feather fall, goodberry, hunter's mark, longstrider
2nd Level (3 slots): calm emotions, darkvision, pass without trace, protect from poison
3rd Level (3 slots): dispel magic, nondetection, sending
4th Level (3 slots): dominate beast, freedom of movement, locate creature
5th Level (2 slots): commune with nature, greater restoration

GRAY MOUSER
medium humanoid (human), neutral
rogue (arcane trickster) 15th level, background: wayfarer

AC: 18 (mage armor); HP: 150 (15D8+75); Initiative: +5; Senses: passive Perception 13; Speed: 30 ft.

STR: 16, DEX: 20, CON: 17, INT: 18, WIS: 16, CHA: 18

Saves: DEX +10, INT +9, WIS +8, CHA +9; Skills: Acrobatics +10, Arcana +9, Deception +9, Insight +8, Investigation +9, Perception +8, Sleight of Hand +15, Stealth +15; Feats: Lucky, Magic Initiate; Tool Proficiency: Thieves' Tools; Weapon Proficiency: Simple, Martial with light or finesse quality; Armor Proficiency: Light; Languages: Common, Draconic, Druidic, Sign, Thieves' Cant;  CR: 8 (3,900 XP); PB: +5

TRAITS
Cunning Strike: You may sacrifice up to two of your sneak attack dice to activate up to two of the following effects: Poison, Trip or Withdraw. Save DC18.
Devious Strike: You may sacrifice an appropriate number of your sneak attack dice to activate one of the following effects: Daze (2D6), Knockout (6D6) or Obscure (3D6).
Evasion: When you're subjected to an effect that allows you to make a DEX save to take only half damage, you instead take no damage if you succeed on your save and only half damage if you fail. You can't use this feature if you have the incapacitated condition.
Heroic Inspiration: 
Magical Ambush: If you have the invisible condition when you cast a spell on a creature, it has disadvantage on any saves it makes against the spell on the same turn.
Resourceful: You gain Heroic Inspiration whenever you finish a Long Rest.
Sneak Attack: Once per turn, you can deal an extra 8D6 damage to one target you hit with an attack roll if you have advantage on your attack roll and you are using a weapon with the finesse or ranged quality. The extra damage type is the same as the weapon used. You don't need advantage on the attack roll if at least one of your allies is within 5 ft. of the target and doesn't have the incapacitated condition and you don't have disadvantage on the attack roll.
Versatile Trickster: You gain the ability to distract targets with your mage hand. When you use the Trip option from Cunning Strike on a target, you can also use that option on another creature within 5 ft. of the target.

ATTACK
Multiattack: You can make up to two attacks melee attacks, one with your shortsword (Scalpel) and the other with your dagger (Cat's Claw).
Shortsword (Scalpel): melee weapon attack (+11 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: D6+6 PLUS you have advantage on your next attack before the end of your next turn)
Dagger (Cat's Claw): melee weapon attack (+11 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: D4+1)

BONUS ACTION
Cunning Action: You can take one from the following actions: Dash, Disengage or Hide.
Mage Hand Legerdemain: Cast mage hand and make the spectral hand invisible. You can also control an active mage hand and make DEX (Sleight of Hand) check with it..
Steady Aim: Give yourself advantage on your next attack roll on your current turn. You can only use this feature if you haven't moved already this turn. Your Speed is 0 ft. for the rest of your current turn.

REACTION
Uncanny Dodge: When an attacker you can see hits you with an attack roll, you can halve the attack's damage against you (round down).

SPELLCASTING
Attribute: INT; Spell DC: 18; Spell Attack: +10; Prepared Spells: 10.
Cantrips: light, mage hand, mind sliver, prestidigitation
1st Level (4 slots): charm person, detect magic, disguise self, mage armor, shield
2nd Level (3 slots): darkvision, invisibility, locate object
3rd Level (2 slots): dispel magic, nondetection

WHAT I'M READING

 

I'm about the head down to Cape Cod this weekend for a library conference there the start of the week. So I'm looking to take down some reading for myself for during the downtime. Rudy's Red Wagon is a counter-cultural rhetoric that we had in our basement (for some reason?) when I was growing up. 

So I'm planning on re-reading it while there. I happen to have a M.A. in rhetorical theory, so this just happens to count as fun for me. (I seem to recall a section on the rhetoric of used car salesmen, that indirectly references Kenneth Burke's concept of identification as a rhetorical appeal.) Should be fun.

Grade: Rather quirky book that I really liked a lot growing up. Give it a B+.

Still working my way through L'incroyable histoire de la litterature français. I've now reached the 18th century and have just finished reading about Voltaire and am just starting out on Jean-Jacques Rousseau. Finding it a very useful book. Just purchased it for my Kindle.

Have put off Amélie Nothomb's Ni d'Eve ni d'Adam for now. Not a bad book, but it's development is a little slower, and I don't have the attention span to it right now. Will return to it later when I have less going on, less on my mind.

GIANTS IN THE EARTH -- ELRIC VIII OF MELNIBONÉ

 

ELRIC OF MELNIBONÉ
medium humanoid, chaotic evil;
fighter (eldritch knight) 20th level, background: noble

AC: 17 (mage armor); HP: 100 (20D10-20); Initiative: +4; Senses: darkvision 120 ft., passive Perception 14; Speed: 30 ft.

STR: 08, DEX: 18, CON: 04, INT: 20, WIS: 18, CHA: 20

Saves: STR +5, DEX +10, CON +3; Immunities: charmed, frightened; Skills: Arcana +11, Athletics +5, History +11, Intimidation +11, Perception +10, Persuasion +11, Religion +11; Feats: Boon of Fortitude, Durable, Magic Initiate (Druid, Wizard), Resilient, Ritual Caster, Skilled, War Caster; Tool Proficiency: Alchemist's Supplies, Melnibonéan chess set;  Weapon Proficiency: Martial, Simple; Armor Proficiency: Heavy, Shield; Languages: Common, Low and High Melnibonéan; CR: 7 (2,900 XP); PB: +6

TRAITS
Action Surge (2/Short Rest): You can take one additional action, except for the Magic action.
Arcane Charge: When you use your Action Surge you can teleport up to 30 ft. to an unoccupied space you can see. You can teleport before or after the additional action.
Concentration: You have advantage on CON saves to maintain your concentration.
Durable: You have advantage of Death Saves.
Fighting Style: Dueling. 
Indomitable (3/Long Rest): You can reroll any save with a +20 bonus to the attempt. 
Resourceful: You gain Heroic Inspiration whenever you complete a Long Rest.
Somatic Components: You may cast spells with somatic components even when one or both of your hands are occupied with weapon or shield.
Studied Attacks: When you make an attack roll against a creature and miss, you have Advantage on your next attack roll against that creature before the end of your next turn.
Tactical Master: You can replace the Weapon Mastery description of any weapon with Push, Sap, or Slow.
Tactical Mind: When you fail an ability check, you can expend one use of your Second Wind ability to push yourself toward success. Rather than regaining HP, roll D10 and add the number rolled to your ability check, potentially turning it into a success. If the check still fails, this use of Second Wind isn't expended.
Tactical Shift: You can use one use of your Second Wind to move up to half your Speed without provoking opportunity attacks.
War Bond: You are bonded to Stormbringer. You can't be disarmed of it unless you have the incapacitated condition.
War Magic: You can replace up to two of your attacks with a cantrip of one action or less.

ACTIONS
Multiattack: You can make up to four Stormbringer attacks per turn.
Stormbringer: melee magic weapon attack (+8 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: D10+4 necrotic damage PLUS target has disadvantage on its next attack roll against you until the start of your next turn PLUS it has disadvantage on the next save it makes against a spell that you cast until the end of your next turn.)
Frightful Presence: Each creature within 10 ft. of you and aware of your presence must succeed on WIS save DC19 or become frightened until the end of your next turn. If the save succeeds, the target can't be frightened by you in this way for the next hour.

RING OF KINGS PROPERTIES
Elemental Command: As per the ring of the same name.
Spell Storing: You can store up to five levels of prepared spells in it.

STORMBRINGER PROPERTIES
Devour Soul: When you reduce a non-construct, non-undead creature to 0 HP, you gain their maximum HP as temporary HP for the next 24 hours. Advantage on all attacks, saves, and ability checks for same period.
Haste (1/day): As per spell of that name.

BONUS ACTIONS
Durable: Spend one of your HD to recover D10 HP.
Potion of Heroism: You gain 10 temporary HP. You gain the benefits of the heroism spell.
Second Wind (special, maximum 4): You regain HP equal to D10+20.
War Bond: If you are on the same plane of existence as Stormbringer, you can summon it to you, causing it to teleport instantly to your hand.

REACTION
Reactive Spell: When you make an opportunity attack, you may cast a spell at the creature rather than attack with a weapon. The spell must have a casting time of one action or less and must target only that creature.

SPELLCASTING
Attribute: INT; Spell DC: 19; Spell Attack: +11; Prepared Spells: 13*
Always Prepared (cast for free, once/Long Rest): detect magic, detect poison and disease, illusory script, identify, mage armor, protection from evil and good, purify food and drink, Tenser's floating disc, unseen servant
Cantrips: chill touch, elementalism, message, mind sliver, prestidigitation, produce flame, resistance
1st Level (4 slots): charm person, comprehend languages, shield, sleep
2nd Level (3 slots): arcane vigor, enhance ability, locate object, suggestion
3rd Level (3 slots): counterspell, dispel magic, tongues, water breathing
4th Level (1 slot): conjure minor elementals

Adapted from original printing of 1E Deities & Demigods.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GEORGE!

 

May is an auspicious month for myself and for Star Wars in general. George Lucas and I share a birthday, which is today, May 14. And the original release of Star Wars was May 25.

Both are better candidates for Star Wars Day than May 4. ("May the Fourth be with you" indeed!). 

Happy 81st birthday, George!

ORELSAN - BASIQUE

 

Through exposure, I have become something of a fan of French rap. I like its variety, inventiveness and social commentary. A few years back, when I was taking some French courses at Tufts, I came across this video. It piqued my interest, so I took a chance on buying the album, La fête est finie. It has turned out to be one of my all-time favorite French albums, I love every track on it. So here we go, the video that started it all. Enjoy!

Orelsan = Aurélien Contentin

L.E.J. - PAS L'TIME

 

This high-energy, frenetic tune is from their second album Pas Peur. I discovered it shortly before the album dropped on Youtube. What I especially like about it is that it is somewhat goofy and highly infectious. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

GIANTS IN THE EARTH - HAROLD SHEA FROM THE COMPLEAT ENCHANTER

 

HAROLD SHEA
medium humanoid (human), chaotic good

rogue 8th (arcane trickster); background: scribe

AC: 16 (mage armor); HD: 64 (8D8+24); Initiative: +4; Senses: passive Perception 16; Speed: 30 ft.

STR: 13, DEX: 19, CON: 17, INT: 18, WIS: 16, CHA: 16

Saves: DEX +6, INT +7; Skills: Athletics +4, Insight +9, Investigation +7, Perception +6, Persuasion +6, Sleight of Hand +7; Feats: Actor, Defensive Duelist, Lucky, Skilled; Tool Proficiency: Calligrapher's Supplies, Thieves' Tools; Weapon Proficiency: simple, martial with finesse or light properties; Armor Proficiency: light; Languages: English, French, Greek, Latin, Thieves' Cant; CR: 2 (450 XP); PB: +3

TRAITS

Cunning Strike: When you deal Sneak Attack damage, you may reduce your sneak attack damage by one die to include one of the following features to your attack: poison, trip or withdraw.

Evasion: When you're subject to an effect that allows you to make a DEX save to take only half damage, you instead take no damage if you succeed on the Save and only half damage if you failed. You can't use this feature if you have the incapacitated condition.

Impersonation: While you're disguised as a real or fictional person, you have advantage on CHA (Deception or Performance) checks to convince others that you are that person.

Lucky: You have 3 Luck points and can spend them on one of the following benefits: advantage on a D20 test OR disadvantage for you opponent on a D20 test.

Mimicry: You can mimic the sounds of other creatures, including speech. A creature that hears your mimicry must succeed on a WIS (Insight) check DC14 to determine the effect is faked.

Reliable Talent: Whenever you make an ability check that uses one of your skill or tool proficiencies, you can treat a D20 roll of 9 or less as an actual 10.

Sneak Attack: Once per turn, you can deal an extra 4D6 to one target you hit with an attack roll if you have advantage on it and the attack uses a finesse or ranged weapon. You don't need advantage on the attack roll if at least one of your allies is within 5 ft. of the target and doesn't have the incapacitated condition, provided also that you don't already have disadvantage of the attack roll.

Syllogismobile: Cast plane shift as a ritual. Requires V, S and M components. Spell is subject to failure. Use the mishap table from the teleport spell to adjudicate results.

ACTIONS

Shortsword: melee weapon attack (+7 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: D6+4 piercing damage PLUS advantage on your next attack roll against the same target)

Dagger: melee weapon attack (+7 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: D4 piercing damage when used as part of standard attack with shortsword OR D4+4 when used by itself)

BONUS ACTIONS

Cunning Action: On your turn, you can take one of the following actions as a bonus action: Dash, Disengage or Hide.

Steady Aim: You can give yourself advantage on your next attack roll on the current turn. You can use this feature only if you haven't moved during this turn, and after you use it, your Speed is 0 until the end of your current turn.

Uncanny Dodge: When an attacker that you can see hits you with an attack roll, you can halve the attack's damage against you.

REACTIONS

Parry: If you are holding a finesse weapon and another creature hits you with a melee attack, you can add +3 to your AC, potentially causing the attack to miss you. Your bonus to AC against melee attacks lasts until the start of your next turn.

SPELLCASTING    

Ability: INT; Spell DC: 15; Spell Attack: +7; Prepared Spells: 6.

Cantrips: light, mage hand, mending, message, prestidigitation, true strike

1st Level (4 slots): comprehend languages, detect magic, illusory script, mage armor

2nd Level (2 slots): augury, suggestion

Nota Bene: The real world languages have analogs in my omniverse: English (Common), French (Averoignèse), Greek (Koine), and Latin (Vulgate). Fluency in analog language may not exceed proficient from the start. If using my homebrew language rules, add Italian (TBD) at proficient and Sign at familiar.

DESCRIPTION

Harold She served for many years as a staff psychologist at an psychiatric institute in Ohio. Although reasonably competent in this position, he felt unsatisfied and unfulfilled. Basically a romantic by nature, he compensated for his unexciting life by taking on rather affected roles and dress, much to the amusement of his friends and co-workers. His chance to escape everyday life came when an older scientist, Reed Chalmers, developed his theory of inter-universal apportation based on the mathematical field of symbolic logic. Harold wasted no time putting the theory into practice and succeeded in dumping himself into the center of Norse mythology. Since then, he has had several adventures in the worlds of myth and fantasy.

Adapted from Dragon magazine #59.

KING CRIMSON - ISLANDS (1971)

 

For a long time, this was my fifth King Crimson album. Mostly on the strength of three phenomenal tracks on this album. Of course, as I've recently posted, Lizard has recently edged it out.

When I listen to it, I hear a profound debt to Bela Bartok, an acknowledged influence on Robert Fripp. It is darkly, baroque in its soundscape. The three tracks are "Sailor's Tale," "Ladies of the Road" and the title track "Islands."

This is the third entirely new lineup for the band, featuring:

Robert Fripp: electric and acoustic guitars, mellotron, organ and devices.
Boz Burrell: bass, lead vocal.
Mel Collins: saxophone, flute, backing vocals.
Ian Wallace: drums, percussion, backing vocals.
Pete Sinfield: lyrics.

Boz Burrell would later go on to play bass for Bad Company. Fripp reputedly taught him to play bass, when they hired him on to sing lead vocals.

Additional musicians include:

Harry Miller: double bass.
Keith Tippett: piano.
Robert Miller: oboe.
Mark Charig: cornet.
Wilf Gibson: violin.
Paulina Lucas: soprano.

Formentera Lady (10:18)
Hate to say it, but the song itself is somewhat forgettable. Not bad, but not something that necessarily sticks with you. Still it sets that darkly classical feel defining this album.

Sailor's Tale (7:29)
This is one of those great King Crimson instrumentals that defines them as a band. I've read someone describe the King Crimson/Robert Fripp aesthetic as an exploration and synthesis of order and chaos in music. That's what this instrumental is. This song is a frantic jam notable for its driving, insistent drum tattoo, blaring sax and screeching, yet musical, guitar drone.

Letters (4:28)
This is a rinse-and-repeat of "Formentera Lady." Of some interest, but largely forgettable.

Ladies of the Road (5:31)
This is the only really blues-influenced track you will find in the King Crimson catalog. Uncharacteristic of Robert Fripp, but inspired. It's King Crimson's "Squeezebox" or "Fat Bottom Girls," something of a dirty musical joke. The subject of the song is the groupies that follow bands and how they throw themselves at the band and get used.

        Two-fingered levi-ed sister
        Said "Peace," I stopped and kissed her.
        Said "I'm a male resister."
        I smiled and just unzipped her.

Of course, the song is probably problematic now. But it's still a song that has groove -with its bluesy guitar and raunchy sax

Prelude: Song of Gulls (4:14)
Basically a string quartet composition with flute. Nothing more.

Islands (11:51)
A sweet, mournful song. One of King Crimson's characteristic showpieces. A lyrical passage followed with a complex, significantly developed instrumental coda which turns out to be the heart of the song itself. The lyrics take a turn at the John Donne conceit implicit in his poem Meditation XVII: "No man is an island."

        Earth, stream and tree encircled by sea
        Waves sweep the sand from my island.
        My sunsets fade.
        Field and glade wait only for rain.
        Grain after grain erodes my
        High-weathered walls which fend off the tide,
        Cradle the wind
        To my island.

        . . .

        Beneath the wind-turned waves
        Infinite peace
        Islands join hands
        'Neath heaven's sea.

The instrumental is an ecstatic and melancholic jam between Charig's brilliant cornet, Miller's contemplative oboe, and Tippett's jazzy, yet restrained piano. Sublime.

Grade: As I said, this album was my fifth KC album for quite some time. But on the strength of just three tracks. Given that, I think I actually have to give it a B-.

ELENOIN (MEDIUM MONSTROSITY CR 06) and GRAHLUK (LARGE MONSTROSITY CR 05)

 

ELENOIN

medium monstrosity, chaotic evil

AC: 14; HP: 99 (11D8+44); Initiative: +4; Senses: passive Perception 10; Speed: 30 ft.

STR: 18, DEX: 18, CON: 18, CHA: 14

Immunities: fear and any mind-altering magic; Languages: common; CR: 6 (2,300 XP); PB: +3

TRAITS
Magic Resistance: It has advantage on Saves versus spells and spell-like effects.

ACTIONS
Multiattack: It can make up to two greatsword attacks.
Bite: melee natural attack (+7 to hit, reach 5 ft. one target. Hit: D6+6)
Greatsword: melee weapon attack (+7 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: D10+6)

GRAHLUK
large monstrosity, chaotic neutral

AC: 16; HP: 100 (10D10+40); Initiative: +2; Senses: passive Perception 10; Speed: 60 ft.

STR: 22, DEX: 14, CON: 18; INT: 08

Languages: common; CR: 7 (2,900 XP); PB: +3

TRAITS
Magic Resistance: It has advantage on Saves versus spells and spell-like effects.

ACTIONS
Rend: melee natural attack (+14 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit 2D6+11 bludgeoning damage)
Rope: melee weapon attack (+14 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: 3D6+11 bludgeoning damage PLUS automatic grapple attempt)

These Melnibonéan monsters are brought to you courtesy of the original first-edition printing of the AD&D Deities & Demigods guide. The Elenoin appear as tall (6 ft.) wild-eyed women with flaming reds hir and shark-like teeth. They whirl two-handed swords and fear no enemy save the ancient foe, the Grahluks, who also hail from their home plane. The Grahluks are their mortal enemy. They appear as devolved, giant ape-like humanoids and armed with rope and shield. Their only goal in life is the death and destruction of the Elenoin race.

FOOTBALL SCORIGAMI

 

Scorigami is a term invented by Secret Base's Jon Bois to describe the phenomenon of an entirely new final score in the history of a sport. It is a portmanteau of the words "score" and "origami" and most generally and specifically applies to American football due to its nonlinear scoring and what I would describe as the "chunki-ness" of their composition.

In American football, the most frequent scoring plays (in order of points, not their frequency) are defensive safety - 2 points, field goal - 3 points, touchdown with no conversion - 6 points, touchdown with extra point - 7 points, and touchdown with two-point coversion - 8 points. But most frequently in intervals of 3 and 7 points. Which leads to both some very rare and impossible final scores available.

Finding those combinations became something of a past-time for me when I played Madden Football with cheats. Could I come up with a legal scoring combo that would yield my actual final scores?